Somebody who repeatedly sends invites and then calls is not going to get a recommendation from me. If you are actually worthy of recommendation, people will probably do them with very little encouragement.
Hounding people for recommendations will either lead to refusal (which will inspire you to write a blog post about people who don't like you), or people will write you a mildly insincere recommendation to avoid causing offence. At that point, you should be grateful that your acquaintance has considerably more social graces than you do.
Actually the backstory to this post is pertinent here as well.
I sent him an email on an old personal email address a few weeks ago, pointing out that we always didn't agree but we always respected and liked each other and if he could spare a few kind words it would mean a lot to me. I didn't receive a response.
I was reading a great book on consulting this week, and it pointed out that you should take emotional chances with our work. Reach out to people emotionally to find out where they are coming from.
About this same time, I noticed he recommended one of the other guys that was on the team.
So I sent him another email at his work address -- basically a repeat of the first email. I figured either he didn't get the first email or the answer was no. And if the answer was no, I should find out why (which I plan on doing when I get back) Either way, it was a win.
Of all things, I did not want an insincere recommendation. Rather I am extremely curious as to why two people who are supposedly experts on teams don't have the mutual respect it takes to point out and praise the positive qualities of the other, even if they disagree. I imagine I somehow ticked the fellow off to the point of hurt feelings, but if so, I am unaware of when that happened. Like I said, on a personal level we always seemed to get along just fine.
Hounding people for recommendations will either lead to refusal (which will inspire you to write a blog post about people who don't like you), or people will write you a mildly insincere recommendation to avoid causing offence. At that point, you should be grateful that your acquaintance has considerably more social graces than you do.