Your remarks about my post have to do with females, that is gender. Today that is a touchy, sensitive, politicized subject.

You seem to be saying that, in dealing with people, should get more information.

In a sense, you are correct: That sense is from applications of the Radon-Nikodym theorem. The charming proof by J. von Neumann is in the W. Rudin Real and Complex Analysis.

In practice, not really: What I mentioned and you object to can be called generalities. Sooooo, in the politically correct world, those are called, say, stereotypes and are offensive.

So, it appears that you see the generalities as drawing some detailed conclusions about someone based just on the generalities. Instead, you want to hold off on the details until there is good evidence one detail and person at a time.

That won't, can't, work very well.

E.g, you are coaching a girl's basketball team. Some of the girls are not doing well. You don't know why, and they are not clearly, explicitly, frankly, honestly telling you why -- such reluctance is common. Soooo, you have to guess. You start with, they are girls, girls tend to be emotional, in particular, afraid. So, try that diagnosis.

Uh, in US society, women get be afraid. Men don't.

You are coaching a boy's basketball team. One of the boys is not doing well. If you even hint that you suspect he is overly emotional, afraid, you would be calling him a "sissy". All the other boys on the team would howl with contempt, point fingers, bend over with laughter. So you don't do that. You assume he has left his emotions of fear in the locker room and is willing to guard Michael Jordan or foul LeBron James, even if Jordan fakes him into the nickel seats or LeBron knocks him there. Afraid? A boy on a round ball team? NO WAY.

In WWII and the battle of Midway, the US sent fighter planes, torpedo planes, and dive bomber planes to attack the Japanese carriers. Of course, the Japanese had fighter planes in the air to protect the carriers. Well, the US planes were poor on coordination, and the torpedo planes attacked with the rest of the US planes still on the way. Well, it would look like the torpedo planes had no chance. And in fact, they didn't have a chance; not even one torpedo hit, and all the torpedo planes were shot down. The US torpedo plane pilots knew they were likely to be shot down, but they flew in anyway. Fear? No room for fear.

Sure, some women can also overcome fear, but they are usually not expected to and still usually don't.

Did I mention, boys and girls are different.

It appears that you want to set aside generalities and assume that the girls are not afraid until it is clear they are or that the boys are afraid until it is clear they are not.

But this clear information you want, and I agree would be good to have, mostly won't be available.

You want to ignore the generalities. But the generalities are from decades of careful observation and have too much good information to discard, especially when the detailed information you want is not available.

What I posted is what was requested, what I wish I'd had in my experience.

I'm not trying to get into current politically correct gender equality arguments. Instead, I was describing what I wish I had known.

What I listed that I wished I'd known was important. A lot of the wishing that you responded to was about love, and that is a challenging subject.

E.g., not knowing what I listed I wished I'd known cost me the relationship with the prettiest human female I ever saw, in person or otherwise. And she was terrific in nearly all respects otherwise. Later I discovered by improbable accident that she really loved me. For me, I still have her high school graduation picture in the UR corner of my computer screen -- I'm still in love with her. That was a failure. I believe that had I known what I wish I had known, I could have saved the relationship, likely had a really good marriage, etc. We would have done well with children: I like children, and she was way over the top in adoring children, especially the faces of children, say, under the age of 5.

E.g., my marriage (to another female) was a failure. Had I known what I listed I wish I'd known, I could have either avoided the marriage or saved it. She was quite sick. Visiting her mother on her family farm, she was missing and her body was found floating in a lake, an apparent suicide. Did I mention failure?

So, both of those females were afraid. Did I mention that I wish I'd understood that females tend to be afraid?

For this subject of fear, I will remind you of a 101 level of a little of it: In now some old and relatively solid clinical psychology, fear is called anxiety and tends to bring paranoia, hysteria, and obsessive-compulsive (OCD), psychopathic-passive behavior. Soooo, if see a lot of symptoms of anxiety (fear, as my quite perceptive Mom, after only 15 minutes, put it, "afraid of her own shadow"), look also for the rest. Your approach fails here -- you are asking everyone to rediscover 100 years of clinical psychology one detail and one person at a time. Then, the anxiety tends to bring stress, and the stress tends to bring depression. The depression lowers productivity and can, thus, can bring more stress. The extra stress can lead to clinical depression which is dangerous -- can cause suicide. And that is EXACTLY what happened. It is just CRUCIAL for someone to understand this 101 level of clinical psychology.

Just what she was afraid of, a detail you would insist on, she would never say, in decades, never say or hint, and would prefer to go to her death than say. Did I mention that some of the details you want won't be available?

And why this 101 clinical psychology mostly for women? Did I mention, women are much more emotional than men? And more afraid?

You want to discard the generalities. Soooo, you discard the information the generalities imply and want to get that information one detail and one person at a time. E.g., you see an anxiety case but want to discard that, from enormous evidence, the generalities say that the anxiety can lead to OCD, stress, depression, clinical depression, and death. Okay, now that they are dead, you have your detailed information. Of course, you have the information too late.

If we're talking gender and essential truths about behavior here, then as one dude to another I honestly have to tell you that:

> For me, I still have her high school graduation picture in the UR corner of my computer screen -- I'm still in love with her. That was a failure. I believe that had I known what I wish I had known, I could have saved the relationship, likely had a really good marriage, etc. We would have done well with children:

This is pretty messed up.

Yes, but you don't know how pretty she was, and how sweet and feminine, etc. otherwise!!

Also, no one understands love, in particular, you don't. I'm not nearly the first man to stay in love for life!

> I'm not nearly the first man to stay in love for life!

Sure, but for most of those dude's it's with their partner.

Yeah, not the only warning flag in there, is it.

Yes, I salute all those who are perfect and apologize again for all my shortcomings!