Wow! Give yourself some credit, you're doing great friend, holding down all those systems, that's a very hard job!
From personal experience, I haven't written any libraries or frameworks and I'm definitely a like 40th-50th percentile coder at best. But I do have family, friends, hobbies, outdoor recreation, exercise, and meaningful contemplation in my life.
This means that though I'm not shreking code 24/7, I have all these wonderful things to recharge my batteries. When I do sit down at work for those 30-40 hours, I get what I need to done, not worrying if it's via stack overflow, copy-pasta, or any method.
And that's totally fine, you don't need to re-invent the wheel or be a wunderkind, just be yourself and take AMPLE time to do things you love outside of work.
From personal experience, I haven't written any libraries or frameworks and I'm definitely a like 40th-50th percentile coder at best. But I do have family, friends, hobbies, outdoor recreation, exercise, and meaningful contemplation in my life.
This means that though I'm not shreking code 24/7, I have all these wonderful things to recharge my batteries. When I do sit down at work for those 30-40 hours, I get what I need to done, not worrying if it's via stack overflow, copy-pasta, or any method.
And that's totally fine, you don't need to re-invent the wheel or be a wunderkind, just be yourself and take AMPLE time to do things you love outside of work.