> Establish competence – The first question on the table in every meeting is “Why should I listen to you?” Bring some content to the dance; a slide or better yet a story that shows you to be someone worthy of attention in your prospect’s busy schedule.
In my experience, trying to "establish competence" doesn't work. Either your accomplishments speak for themselves, your reputation precedes you, or someone vouches for you. You can't foist a "story" on someone who doesn't know you.
Yes you can definitely establish whatever image you'd like to project, with practice.
It's all about perception and stereotypes. From the clothes you wear, the tone you speak, the way you shake hands, and the amount of smile you give, etc etc.
I'm by no means good at this, but here are a few things I'm learning to become a good projector with some success:
to look confident, remember confidence ~= competence
- strong hand-shake, with a warm and dry hand. I have slow blood flow, so sometimes I get a hot coffee to warm them up before meeting someone.
- open arms, do not cross fingers
- show disagreement with good reasons occasionally, but do not argue.
- throw a witty joke/comment here and there
- do not smile all the time (this is because I was raised to smile a lot, which seems to be the case for many Asians)
- pay attention when listening, but do not fear asking questions or admit I do not understand particular thing
- pay attention when speaking, adjust speed/explanation based on reaction
to look funny in casual environments, just one particular type of funny out of the many
- a joke/exaggeration must be thrown into the mix within first 5 minutes, to establish the expectation of being funny
- step out of social boundaries as soon as I can, like a funny comment on racism/sexism/stereotype
- never laugh at my own jokes, and try to keep a straight face
- not be afraid of offending others, actually make fun of them whenever possible, and try to never get offended myself
- do not apologize
"It's all about perception and stereotypes. From the clothes you wear, the tone you speak, the way you shake hands, and the amount of smile you give, etc etc."
I totally agree with this - some stereotypes are GREAT for your image. For example, being viewed as a "Smart asian" gives you credibility when talking about science/math, while a "Smooth talker" has more ethos when talking about consumer relations.
> Establish competence – The first question on the table in every meeting is “Why should I listen to you?” Bring some content to the dance; a slide or better yet a story that shows you to be someone worthy of attention in your prospect’s busy schedule.
In my experience, trying to "establish competence" doesn't work. Either your accomplishments speak for themselves, your reputation precedes you, or someone vouches for you. You can't foist a "story" on someone who doesn't know you.