Isn't the solution to add artificial scarcity by limiting the number of users that someone can contact per month, say?
A user should be able to tell the app/site "Don't let anyone contact me if they've contacted someone else in the past week".
Of course that would be terrible for ad revenue of the app/site, and there could be some interesting meta-gaming of how users set these rate limits (or try to get around them), but I think it would lead to a more balanced experience over all.
Coffee Meets Bagel implements something like this, where each person is presented a small number of people per day, regardless of whether you choose to match or not. They seem to have had issues with the quality of number on it recently, but I was a big fan of it in around 2015-2017
A user should be able to tell the app/site "Don't let anyone contact me if they've contacted someone else in the past week".
Of course that would be terrible for ad revenue of the app/site, and there could be some interesting meta-gaming of how users set these rate limits (or try to get around them), but I think it would lead to a more balanced experience over all.