Realistically, you have two options: to use Linux or to trade your control and freedom for convenience.

In case the control and freedom are important for you, why not to switch to Linux, purchase Pinephone or Librem, use DD-WRT/VyOS/pfSense for your router?

It is pretty clear Apple doesn't think it is your computer. Similar to how they feel about their phones that they let people use.

edit-to-add: further evidenced by Apple's stance on right-to-repair.