> "Being who you are", "Staying true to yourself" etc, are very negative things to tell someone
I disagree with this though I think I understand how the lack of nuance in "be yourself" can allow it to be easily misinterpreted.
> I used to really like X, it was a core part of my identity. One day I simply decided to not do X anymore, I didn't like the people doing X and I didn't see any successful people in my orbit, and I replaced it with Y & Z.
This is basically the textbook definition of "Being who you are" or "Staying true to yourself"
The "Textbook definition" point you made is quite confusing.
"Being who you are" means that you keep your values static and shape your decisions around those, unless there is some additional nuance to this.
The GP is making a point that you need to make a clear assessment of yourself - in particular your actions, your deficiencies and strengths and identify values to adopt which could make a positive impact to your life. That's not the the same thing according to me, unless I misinterpreted what you intended.
I disagree with this though I think I understand how the lack of nuance in "be yourself" can allow it to be easily misinterpreted.
> I used to really like X, it was a core part of my identity. One day I simply decided to not do X anymore, I didn't like the people doing X and I didn't see any successful people in my orbit, and I replaced it with Y & Z.
This is basically the textbook definition of "Being who you are" or "Staying true to yourself"