I was in a similar boat but finally mustered the commitment to mount a serious ascension attempt that spanned a couple of months part time (playing iNethack on the phone helped). It was SO enjoyable despite being killed by the High Priest of Moloch on level 45.

My daughters (21 & 23) have inherited this addiction though the prefer the isometric Vultures’s Eye.

First encountered Nethack in 1988. Only ever ascended once in the early days. It’s definitely gotten harder over the years. But maybe that’s just my attention to detail deteriorating.