SV companies are constantly trying to find new ways to push the "life/work" balance as solidly an inextricably towards "work" as possible. Coercing you to be in SV shows you're committed to that, and are willing to sacrifice attachments you might have to family in other areas to give it all to the company. Making you be on site in SV gives them access to so many more work-squeezing tactics. Free lunches! (less personal time during lunches and you're talking about work at lunch anyways) On-site laundry! (less time you're doing mundane chores, more time you're working.)
It's a bit like stockbrokers in NYC. In order to be taken seriously by your peers, you have to spring for the expensive luxury Manhattan apartment. If you live in Queens or New Jersey and commute into Manhattan, that tells the brokerage you won't be hungry enough to work as aggressively as they need and you will be first in line to be fired.
Yeah that's not the issue. It's when an entire industry is set up this way and the people with the real money want their highly pair employees to be competitive and addicted to their high pay.
So what you are saying instead is find a better industry to be in and better people to work for.
Ultimately though distribution of wealth as incredibly unequal as it is limits that choice substantially.
Self reinforcing loop. Publicly traded company has officers who have a fiduciary responsibility to return on investment aka they need to keep the stock price up and/or generate returns. Doesn't even have to be public, just one where the owners or investors are cracking the whip.
Consistently failing to make it grow mean they get the axe, which means they replace the nice, patient people with aggressive type-a folks who do what needs to be done. Rise-and-repeat over several cycles and you start to see this hardcore work culture.
The fat bonuses only reinforce it further. If you're gonna be copping six-figure bonuses you either hustle or you gtfo of the way, because there are plenty of people that would bust their ass for that chance. Again, play that cycle out over a few decades and here we are.
It's toxic as hell, but it shouldn't be surprising that it turns out this way since it's 100% structural.
