Workaround: Don't change your name when you get married. Less work, it makes genealogy research for your descendants easier. And the only downside is people guess the wrong name because of all the patriarchy.
There are always exceptions. I have a friend who had a bad history with her family, so she really wanted to take her husband's name. But I still believe that keeping your pre-married name is usually the best choice if you don't want your identity to be lost or subsumed.
That's incredibly dismissive of couples who decide to pick a shared family name. There are more downsides than people guessing wrong, but that's beside the point. You're basically arguing that the only reason people do it is patriarchy and giving up your native name is giving up your identity as if it were a form of oppression.
Eh, people choose oppression for themselves all the time. We have a right to determine our own identity, for sure. It's just unfortunate that people just happen to make the choice that supports patriarchy the most often, that you wonder what forces are really in play.
There are always exceptions. I have a friend who had a bad history with her family, so she really wanted to take her husband's name. But I still believe that keeping your pre-married name is usually the best choice if you don't want your identity to be lost or subsumed.