I build car dashboard software. You are right. The SW is shit. Exceptions, from what i've head are Volvo and Daimler. Don't know the kind of resources Tesla puts into their SW and am not sure if it's not just hype.
I'll second Volvo, we bought a used 2003 XC-90 several years ago and the Nav in it was great. Even with the 10 year old discs it found 95% of what we needed by name or waypoint and the interface was incredibly easy to navigate while driving. I chalk that up to the fact that it's _not_ a touchscreen, which means you can build muscle memory and menus were super predictably.
