I've worked as an employee for 2 startups, both of which failed. I had options for one and took all-cash compensation for the other. I've also founded two, one of which outright failed and the other of which is still in search mode. And I worked at a big company, where roughly 50% of my rather generous compensation was in equity.
I'm arguing that the reasonable thing to take is not salary, the reasonable thing to do is get a different job. It's not worth fighting over the scraps of a company that's going nowhere. Find someplace where the pie is expanding and then you avoid all the fights and backstabbing over who gets the pie. If you can't find such a place, create one. (That's why I'm founding a startup now; I'm not averse to working as an employee for someone else as long as they have their shit together, but I see relatively few such companies that I'd like to work for right now.)
I'm arguing that the reasonable thing to take is not salary, the reasonable thing to do is get a different job. It's not worth fighting over the scraps of a company that's going nowhere. Find someplace where the pie is expanding and then you avoid all the fights and backstabbing over who gets the pie. If you can't find such a place, create one. (That's why I'm founding a startup now; I'm not averse to working as an employee for someone else as long as they have their shit together, but I see relatively few such companies that I'd like to work for right now.)