IMO the problem is about making people feel bad. Arrogance is the "I'm smart you're not" attitude.

Sometimes you think you're helping and sometimes you're actually helping but you're still making people feel bad about themselves.

YC recommended a nice book that can help you avoid being arrogant: Non-violent communication: a language of life

https://books.google.com.br/books?id=nY4tDDO93E8C&printsec=f...